Insignificant.

I do feel ashamed.

I feel like history constantly repeats itself and we are once again in the sidelines.

That those who are fated to survive will, and others will die – no matter how I feel about it.

I feel insignificant in the mass of the world.

I feel insignificant as the world leaders ignore your posts and cries.

Because I was there – I was crying for my people, for the land that oozes in my blood. For the feeling of home, once again. And I felt voiceless.

And I feel voiceless once again. Like my sharing of the babies dying and the kids being blown apart really makes no difference. That I am once again insignificant in this world of power and money.

That to feel like I can keep going, I can only stay silent and focus on my life. It’s not self-care. It’s not ignorance.

It’s voicelessness.

I’ve been here before and something tells me I’ll be here again many times throughout my life. That we can scream at the top of our lungs, cry silent tears, walk along highways and not much will change.

That the killing will not stop.

So please do not judge me for not knowing what to say. I am not neutral, and I am not practicing self-care.

I am simply insignificant.